By an Adopt4Life Community Parent
When we adopted our third child as an infant, I knew that there were many choices for us to make, what best car seat to get, crib design and of course, best way to feed her. You see our older two children, who are also adopted came to us an older age, so a lot of these decision, simply wasn’t on our minds.
After much research, dr. appointments and reading, I came to the decision that I wanted to bottle feed her. Although we knew that breast milk was always the most nutrient option. I knew in my heart that it wasn’t for us.
I had mixed emotions of my decision—you see, I’ve come from a long line of breast feeding mamas. Lots of feelings began to rear its ugly head; guilt, shame but at the same time relief. I had spent the better part of 5 years going through IVF treatments, giving myself hundreds of needles, surgeries, procedures, followed by multiple miscarriages. I felt, in a way, betrayed by my body. In attending doctor appointments to learn of the different ways I could induce lactation, a sense of pure anxiety came over me. My body—was just done. So, I gave myself permission to heal, and turned my guilt and feelings of being selfish, into the encouragement I needed to learn how to bottle feed while focusing attachment. We learned about skin to skin, making eye contact, researched for hours on end to learn what the best formula was, and off we went into our bottle-feeding journey.
I often waited during those bottle-feeding years, for comments from my family or friends, the side looks or the “breast is best” discussions to occur and was surprised that I was surrounded by nothing but love. I had made a decision that was best for both baby and myself as knew that pushing myself to breast feed would have so many negative affects on my ability to bond with her. At the end of the day, it was my body, my child and my decision, one that I do not regret. I look towards breast feeding moms with so much admiration, as the work and dedication that it takes to induce lactation is beyond hard work. I will also always believe that breast milk hold more nutrients for babies over formula and lastly I know in my heart, that I made the right decision by choosing bottle feed my baby.
So, to all the moms and dads out there who have made the decision to bottle feed—for whatever reason, please know that you are not alone. May our babies be fed, loved and nourished.